Pet Peeves

1. Being asked "Why don't you have a boyfriend?" or "How are you still single?" Seriously. It's annoying.
2. Bad manners.
3. Long hair on men. Unless you're Fabio, just don't do it.
4. Socks with sandals.
5. Constant tardiness.
6. People who wear the price tag on the outside of their clothes. Seriously? I don't give a sh** what you paid. You still look stupid.
7. "One Uppers". People that always have to top your latest story...yeah. They suck.
8. Fat children; Chubby is one thing- but obese and waddling around the playground? Shy of it being a medical condition, I think it's literally borderline child abuse. And it's sad.
9. Couples who claim they never fight.(see #13.)
10. Hot men with ugly women.
11. Hot women with ugly men.
12. Baby girls dressed in hideous poofy pink outfits. Taffeta skirts are NOT for girls under 3 or over 16.
13. Liars.
14. Cheaters.
15. Being rude to the wait staff at restaurants.
16. Phone calls from men after 10pm that are not expected or a dire emergency.
17. Girls who wear heels they can't walk in.
18. Guys who try too hard.
19. Being called "sweetie" by a waiter or waitress. "That one actually conjures up a little pang of anger anytime I even think about it."
20. Dumb Sluts (referred in posts as DS.)
21. Guys who act as though they're way cooler than me. Also known as "Bro's"
22. Name droppers. Usually those folks are guilty of #7.
23. Animal abuse. (This is not meant to be funny. I'm literally repulsed by it and those who do it.)
24. Getting ignored by female bartenders. (Bitchy attitude = NO TIP)
25. Bad customer service.
26. People who hate America.
27. People who hate the military.
28. Faith Fanatics (FF).
29. A dirty bathroom.
30. Women (or men) who apply makeup while driving. That's scarier than texting In My Fabulous Opinion (IMFO).

31. Panty Lines (PL's).
32. White shoes BEFORE Memorial Day and AFTER Labor Day. (Being southern- this is ESPECIALLY frustrating since 90% of women just completely dismiss this fact. They just think "Warm weather = white shoes". NO! )

"You had me at espresso."

Coffee. I love it. "America runs on Dunkin". I live on it. Every day. This liquid form of heaven drips into a pot every morning in my cozy apartment at 0500. Thanks to my snooze button being within reach, I don't pour myself a steamy cup until about 0520...0540...oh who the hell am I kidding. It's usually getting dumped into my pink to-go cup as I dash out the door just in time to catch the HOV lane...and by catch, I mean I hop on it at 0605, sometimes 0610 fully prepared the fend off any cop who might pull me over.
Something about being caffeinated to the point of heart murmurs just makes me happy. Really  happy. But it doesn't have the same effect every day. Some days, it just hits me like a trainwreck. Instantly I'm bouncing off the walls, tripping over my sentences, and making plans for a long run after work. Other days- 4 cups later I feel the buzz and then the feeling of nausea from so much liquid takes over and kills the buzz. Then I just want to nap which feels completely wrong after downing that much coffee.

Europe seems to have the right idea on how to get that fantastic buzz and avoid the feeling of wanting to puke. One word: Espresso. This tiny, shot glass looking cup of coffee is just beyond amazing. Although without sugar, it tastes like licking straight coffee grounds; and small sips are the only way to tolerate it without making the face that resembles the one you would make after shooting warm, cheap tequila. (kinda makes you gag just thinking about it, huh?) But with one sugar pack and a barbie-sized-spoon, you're on your way to looking trendy as you sip your way to a caffeine high like no other. It's one where you convince yourself that running a 1/2 marathon will be fun, that you're going to clean out your closet after the marathon, then field day your apartment. By the end of the day, the buzz has worn off and you're simply exhausted from THINKING about all those things to do. But just one more cup- and it's back to marathon planning!
Anyway. I'm currently shopping for an espresso maker so I will absolutely report back when I find my little gem.